A man is in a hotel lobby He wants to ask the clerk a question

A man is in a hotel lobby. 

He wants to ask the clerk a question. 

As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite startled. 

The man turns to her and says, “Ma’am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you’ll forgive me.” She replies, “If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I’m in room 436.” 

Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there, the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back, he says, “Honey, my hands are freezing!” She says, “Well, put them here between my thighs and that will warm them up.” 

After lunch he goes back out to chop some more wood and comes back and says again, “Man! My hands are really freezing!” She says again, “Well, put them here between my thighs and warm them up.” He does, and again that warms him up. 

After dinner, he goes out one more time to chop some wood to get them through the night. When he returns, he says again, “Honey, my hands are really, really freezing!” She looks at him and says, “For crying out loud, don’t your ears ever get cold?”



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